If I had any valuable advice to offer anyone it would be this: Never compare yourself to anyone else.
I think I got that message initially from the 1927 poem by Max Ehrmann called Desiderata. It was framed, in my bedroom, as a teenager. It is still a great piece of writing.
There was that one line that resonated.
“If you compare yourself you will become vain or bitter for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”
It is just a no-win situation. There’s always going to be someone more successful, intelligent, more attractive, with a nicer house, and more money in the bank.
Having said that, I am about to compare myself.
While we are “all created equal” — there are simply some people who are most assuredly not like me.
Off the top of my head:
Dr. Sanjay Gupta (star of CNN’s every single show they have) and renowned COVID expert. I imagine I have seen him, in the media, every single day of the pandemic and have appreciated him being there. It got me thinking though. When does he sleep?
Gupta is on all the time and its usually live TV rather than pre-recorded. Every day. Every week. For over a year. Then, on some Saturdays they have him hosting a chat with The Muppets. In his spare time, he is a neurosurgeon, which is his actual day job.
Oh, and he recently published a book on brain health. Really? I need a nap just thinking about his schedule.
By comparison, I took up the hobby of diamond art whereby I glue little teeny tiny beads onto a canvas to create a picture. (Think paint by number but with beads.) I mean it’s a fun escape, but it is not brain surgery!
With young U.S. poet laureate Amanda Gorman, her presidential inauguration poem The Hill We Climb is still echoing in my head. It wasn’t just her prose. It was her poise under such intense pressure with the world watching. It was her flawless presentation. She is just a natural communicator. She’s 22 and has three books coming out.
She made me wish I had paid more attention in English class. While I know we studied poetry, I don’t remember much of it. There was that one about a tree. “I think I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree." That’s all I recall.
I remember the one about the raven who squawked “Nevermore." Back then, if it didn’t rhyme it didn’t really speak to me. I still giggle at “There once was a girl from Nantucket…”
Sir Thomas Moore... well, there simply is no comparison to this wonderful British man who lost his life to COVID recently. He’s the 100-year-old gentleman who raised millions of dollars for the National Health Service in England by accepting donations for walking around his garden using his walker.
That was not his only contribution to the world, just the one that made him famous. When you look up the word “incomparable” in the dictionary, I think Sir Tom’s picture should be there.
There are simply some people who raise the bar higher and go far beyond what we mere mortals do.
It is not only people who are putting me to shame.
Let me tell you about this monkey I follow on Facebook. She is a domesticated Capuchin monkey. There is no captivity. She lives with her human family in North Carolina.
She is incredibly talented as a painter and baker, with a following of seven million on social media. She has her own bank account, and chances are she’s not overdrawn. She knows how to wash dishes. She has an Easy Bake Oven and makes fluffy cupcakes that make mine look like pancakes. Adorable, smart and sassy. I am in awe of little Gaitlyn Rae.
I check everyday to see what more she accomplished than I did. Sad, really.
Everywhere I look there are incredible people/animals doing great things in this not-so-great time.
I hope you know who you are and how much you are inspiring the rest of us.
I may not know your names, but I see what you’re doing out there.
Every country, town, neighbourhood, and household has someone who goes above and beyond.
The absolute truth is that we are all essential to someone, and we don’t have to make headlines to make a contribution.
Maybe the answer is not to compare oneself, but to allow others' examples of excellence to encourage us.
Back to Desiderata:
“With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.”
That I can manage!
