Everyone who knew Michelle Bader described her as a loving mother with a smile that could light up a room.
When the 42-year-old Whitchurch-Stouffville mother and her five-year-daughter, Heidi, died in an ATV crash near Burk's Falls at the family cottage Sunday night, it shook the community where they lived with son Erik, 9, who sustained non-life-threatening injuries in the crash.
“We are all so gutted,” said friend Janice Kelly Patera. “My heart is completely broken for her son and her family. Poor Erik, I can’t even imagine, it’s unimaginable.”
Bader was Tanya Zalina’s former next-door neighbour when the two hit it off and their friendship blossomed.
“She was wonderful and Heidi was so sweet,” said Zalina.
Last year when Zalina was spending Valentine’s Day alone, Bader went out of her way to invite her over and even had gifts for her.
“She was caring and observant and checked in on me,” Zalina said.
More than anything, Bader cared about her kids and would go the extra mile with Zalina’s children, too.
“When the kids were away, all she did was talk about them,” she said. “My kids and her kids used to play games over our fences in the backyard and she used to leave cupcakes and other treats on my front porch for my kids.”
Zalina had just seen Bader and her children a few days before the tragic accident.
“Heidi was very sweet, she used to be so quiet but brave and when I saw her on Friday, she was full of confidence and not quiet at all anymore,” she said.
Bader was a teacher at Royal St. George’s College, a private boys school in Toronto, where she taught Canadian and world studies.
"Michelle was a beacon of light in our community," Stephen Beatty, headmaster at St. George's College, wrote in a letter to staff and students. "Michelle brought her joyful spirit and optimism into the classroom every day. Michelle took her teaching and the care of our students seriously, but she never took herself seriously. Michelle was the first to laugh at any situation, including herself. She truly found the joy in everything."
Comments poured in on a Whitchurch-Stouffville community Facebook page Tuesday evening as residents learned about the tragedy.
“Such a lovely person. Always so kind and welcoming. Michelle will be missed,” wrote one person.
“Words can not express my sadness — Michelle was such a lovely lady,” said another.
“This is so heartbreaking,” wrote another. “Her children were her world. This news is so devastating. My love, prayers and deepest sympathy go to her son and family.”
A fundraiser has been started by Mark Holyome to help Erik pay for counselling on his journey to healing with a goal of raising $25,000.
“The purpose of this campaign is to provide Erik with enough funds to cover out-of-pocket counselling expenses from now until he turns eighteen,” wrote Holyome. “Any monies not spent on counselling can go towards his post-secondary education plans. The goal is to provide Erik with as much trauma counselling as he needs over the next decade and to make sure that he never has to go without a professional shoulder to cry on, or someone knowledgeable about grief to talk to.”
You can donate to the fundraiser for Erik here.
Editor's Note, Oct. 16, 2023: The name of the school attended by the children has been removed from the article due to privacy concerns at the request of a family member.
